Why Harry Potter is Better Than Twilight
by InsaneAndLovingIt10
Summary: So yeah...got bored and wanted to do this. Honestly, the excuses Twihards have come up with?...I'm traumatised...Read if you dare! T coz I get VERY defensive of Harry Potter!
1. Chapter 1

_Ok, so I was reading a story like this and I thought 'Why don't I do a story like that?' So, here it is!_

**1. ****Robert Pattinson, can you say HOT? And he's totally sexy when he sparkles!**

Yeah, creepy much? He's a book character, how would we know if he's hot? (apart from Bella telling us, but who cares what she thinks?) I think I'd be too overwhelmed with the intensity of the light from him and trying to get my vision back to actually see if he's sexy when he sparkles!

**2. Taylor Lautner, I mean, have you SEEN those muscles?**

How many times have I heard this! I just want to crawl in a hole, at least to escape these comments! And no, I haven't seen those muscles, HE'S A CHARACTER IN A BOOK!

**3. Kristen Stewart. An extremely talented and beautiful actress, with loads of potential.**

Yawn. Emotionless, flat manlike voice, boring: perfect for Bella! And why does she always have her mouth slightly open? It makes her look...weird. Even on the poster for Eclipse (which is, unfortunately, stuck in my school library), she has the same expression.

**4. The Volturi. REALISTIC villains, instead of insane freaks in cloaks, like Voldemort and the Death Eaters.**

Um, I haven't read the Twilight books for at least a year (and I don't plan on it), but I'm pretty sure that the Volturi wear cloaks!

Yes, Voldemort and the Death Eaters are insane (cough, Bellatrix, cough), but that gives them character! Unlike the Volturi, who sit around and talk and then decide to destroy Bella because she's a human, even though she won't rat on them to the humans! (It's not as if the humans could do anything to the vampires anyway). Voldemort has a legit reason for wanting to kill Harry, because Harry would kill him! Suck it up, Twijerks.

**5. Because its just common sence to like twilight! Haha. Romance means everything. Bella and Edward are like, MENT 4 each other, and everything is just...PERFECT! In Harry potter, u would that that harry and harmonie would like...fall in love or something...and then u watch people die in freaky ways, and then there are creepy things...GAHH! but yea. (: **

Please use proper grammar. Hermione is spelt as H-E-R-M-I-O-N-E, not H-A-R-M-O-N-I-E. And their relationship is not like that! Harry and Hermione are like brother and sister, they don't love each other!

Yes, Bella and Edward are meant for each other. Because they are both romance-filled, mushy Mary Sues who need to get a life. And a plot. You're right, everything in here is perfect. TOO perfect (insert shiver).

Life isn't that perfect! If it was, I'd be super popular and absolutely gorgeous. In reality, I'm pretty plain looking with glasses and an unpopular super nerd who's read half of the school library and got 30/30 in History. Get over it.

**6. Because it's one of the greatest love stories ever! Harry Potter is good too, but Twilight has way more romance and more hot guys...EDWARD, JASPER, EMMETT, CARLISLE! Need I say more!**

No, you need not say more, because I am about to lose control of my stomach. That's just what it is: a love story. No complex, emotion-turned plot, just 'Oooh, I love you, Eddie!' 'I love you too, Bella!' Yawn.

You know, I'm willing to bet that if the above listed guys weren't vampires and therefore weren't hot, you wouldn't give them a second look. At least in the Harry Potter books, it's not all fluff and mush!

**7. Yes, we all know that Harry Potter and Twilight are both fiction, but Twilight is clearly better. When I read a book, I like to imagine myself in the plot or relate to the story somewhat. Aside from the vampire theme, Twilight actually takes place in a REAL town with up to date things. ex) cars, school, etc. I'm sorry but I just can't picture myself on a flying train, eating chocolate covered frogs, headed to a non existent magical school. In my opinion, Twilight is obviously better. **

Boo hoo for you. I can imagine myself in the Harry Potter world. In fact, I do it all the time! Are you saying that England and Scotland aren't real? And the castle actually does exist, you know! So technically, the school's real! :) Rowling was actually imaginative enough to come up with a whole new place, unlike Meyer, who had to use a real place! It's FICTION, people!

Uh, the train doesn't fly. It uses tracks. Like a boring Muggle train.

Have you ever eaten a Freddo Frog? It's a frog, covered in, you guessed it, chocolate! So there. Go shove your opinion in a very painful place.

**8. OMGGG Harry POtter is messed up. Like seriusly, he needs to grow up and stop being so boring cuz edward is like waaaaaaay more AMAZINNNG. therees no love in hary potter and nobodies hot who wants to read a book without hot peeps? **

I can use better grammar from a phone, and I'm assuming that you're using a computer!

Actually, quite a few boys in Harry Potter are hot (Harry Potter, Ron Weasley and Neville Longbottom, to name three, but they're my opinion) and Harry and Ginny (and even Ron and Hermione) didn't take one look at each other, think 'I hate you because you smell good!' and then start a romance! Their love is much more interesting! They struggle through their feelings for each other, jealousy when one goes out with someone else (Ron/Lavender) and they're afraid of being rejected by the other, so they squash their feelings down.

How is Edward more amazing? And how is Harry Potter messed up? Harry has lived in a hard and painful life and you think he needs to grow up? Get out. Now. And hot peeps aren't everything, you air-head!

**9. Each book in the twilight series has a different story line. It is mainly about Bella's Lovestory but in the 1st book it was about how Edward had to save Bella and in each book the story changes. The main reason of the book is for Bella To become A vampire. Then after that it is the story with Renesmee. In Harry Potter it takes 7 or 8 books to get to the point. Killing the one who must not be named. it drags on and on and becomes boring. **

Each book in Harry Potter has a different storyline, while sticking to the same plot! We all knew that Bella would eventually become a vampire, but never in our wildest dreams did we imagine that Harry would be a Horcrux! (sorry for any spoilers if you haven't read DH!)

Exactly, the main reason of the books was for Bella to become a vampire. Bo-ring. I actually didn't see much about Renesmee, just a couple of chapters. And Harry Potter is not boring! What, you'd prefer one or two books where Harry grows from eleven to seventeen, goes up to Voldemort, shoots a spell at him and kills him? Yawn.

We watched Harry grow up over seven books and confront life but over four books, Bella and Edward have romance and have a child, in the space of one or two years. Yay. All about the love, people!

**10. Twilight has a more reasonable plot than HarryPotter. Look at Harry and you'll see he's more angsty than Bella. And all the Harry Potter books are like Harry being "My life sucks" and then Voldemort shows up and he's like "I'm going to kill you" and Harry's all like "No way" and then Harry wins in the end. It's way obvious, especially when the author already tells you how many books there's going to be. I mean, why can't we live in total suspense on what's going to happen next? Twilight gives that suspense that something amazing is going to happen that Harry Potter never gave us. Plus, Harry Potter is a wizard and wizards are demonic creatures. Who would want to root for a demon as the good guys? In twilight, everyone's a vampire, and vampires aren't Satan's spawn.**

Umm, ok. I'm going to start off by pointing out that we already knew that Voldemort would eventually be defeated. How could J.K. Rowling make that suspenseful? She made how Harry killed Voldemort suspenseful! In Prisoner of Azkaban, I never suspected that Pettigrew was the traitor! In Chamber of Secrets, I never would've guessed that Ginny Weasley was the one controlling the basilisk (even if it was really Tom Riddle doing it through her). How's that for suspense?

And Harry's not like that! Sure, he knows he doesn't have the best life, but he doesn't get all depressed over it! He broods for a bit (he's got to be sad at some point) and then he moves on! The fact that it's taken seven books shows how good the plot is! And Voldemort's more discreet than that! He doesn't go up to Harry and say "I'm going to kill you, Avada Kedavra!"

Witches and wizards are people, unlike the (undead and soulless, I should point out) vampires! Go look up the definition of witch and wizard!

More angsty than Bella? I don't see him jumping off a cliff when his girlfriend (or, in Bella's case, boyfriend) leaves him!

_Whew, done!_


	2. Chapter 2

_Good news for you guys: this story is finished! The actual chapters, I mean! I've got them written here! I'll just post a chap a day, this story is only six chapters long. Sorry guys but there are only so many excuses, but if you can find more websites or reasons for me to use, I'll gladly continue this! (I've already found eatliver . com)._

_Or I could include a few chappies dedicated to you reviewers if you come up with your own reasons and say that they're yours…or you could write your own story, I'm not fussed XD_

_azzynicole: Thumbs up back! ;)_

_sparrowflyaway: You're very welcome! Ah, I don't mind if you go on for hours, I tend to do that too…I drive my family mad ;D_

_dreamerbydawn: I know what you mean! But even if Harry WAS more angsty than Bella, he's earned the right! His parents, godfather and some friends were killed by Voldemort, he's been hunted down and what's Bella done? ...Yeah, don't answer that._

_Yeah, very good point, Voldemort does go into the thick of it but the Volturi don't fight when outnumbered…Yeah, personally, I DETEST the Jacob/Nessie relationship and Ed/Bella? Don't get me started…_

_madnessdownunder2: Excellent! I love all those retorts you came up with! I especially like 7 ;) Maybe that'll help me enjoy school more…_

_pottergoose: I sent you a PM, I'm not even going to say anything here…_

**11. In harry potter all they do is fly around on brooms and kill people with magic sticks (wands) I mean, really?**

Oh? So there's no culture, no racism, no creativity? Who would've thought of Cauldron Cakes and Liquorice Wands? And a pretty, sparkly, golden-eyed vampire is more creative than that, huh? I think this world has lost it.

JKR took broomsticks and created Quidditch. She took wands and witches and wizards and created a school for them and an entire civilisation. She even wrote more books for Harry Potter, like a fairy tale book (The Tales of Beedle the Bard) and a magical creature book (Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them) to give us a better understanding of such a structured culture! I don't see Meyer doing this for Twilight!

Oh, mustn't forget the HP studio that's now open for tour (Merlin, I want to go there sooo much!) and the HP amusement park and stuff like that!

**12. Edward wasn't a dork. Yeah, sometimes, dorks are cute. However, Harry was a bit too dorky and I can't see why girls even liked him. **

I like Harry! I reckon Eddie is a dork; he dazzles all the girls around him and he acts like everything's fine, normal and dandy and says he doesn't notice! Wow. And then when he notices that he does it to Bella, he enjoys it!

And people love Harry Potter because of the plot and conflict and love and struggles (basically, the emotional tumult), not just because he's hot! But people only love Ed coz of his looks. Life's not all about looks you know! I'd prefer a butt-ugly guy who treats me like I'm worth something rather than a pretty-boy who only wants to date me for social status or treats me like a slave!

Oh, and you idiots only like Twilight because of their looks in the movie!

**13. Harry Potter is for virgin nerds. Twilight is for cool and mature people.**

I'm not cool and I still act like a five year old sometimes, so no Twilight for me! :P So basically, you're saying that if we haven't had sex and we're nerds, we have to be stuck reading Harry Potter? I think I prefer that to being cool and mature :) And anyway, how many pregnant ten year olds do you see? I read Twilight when I was twelve! And it sucked. So there.

**14. Hermione is a week character. Unline Bella, who struggles every day. Hermione has no problems, the only things she has are self-created. She follows Harry into his troubles. Big whoop. Even if she is teased about being a mud blood or whatever its called, she has a choice. She could quit Hogwarts or something. Bella has no choice, she is in love. **

Yes, Bella struggles every day because she's a total drama queen and her only problems are love and her (very selfish, I might say) desire to become a vampire and leave her family behind. Hermione has more problems that that! Problems that are actually real and not all about love for a pretty-boy vamp!

She follows Harry into danger because she stands up for what's right and she's a good friend. She does get teased about being a Mudblood and that's the Muggle equivalent of being called a nerd or being bullied, like I've been, but you don't see me dropping out of school! You see some races being bullied and discriminated against, which is pretty much the Muggle version of Mudbloods, and they don't choose to be called the names they do!

And Hermione punched the ferret in the face, she _can _stand up for herself! 'Bella has no choice, she's in love'. Please, I've heard better excuses from my seven year old sister! Everyone has a choice, they just say that they had no choice when they want to take the easy way out! Bella _chooses _to be in love, she could just as easily ditch Edward and make the right choice!

**15. Twilight was a best selling novel, and has a bigger fan base than Harry Potter.**

Oh, really? Well, if you go to the address that I'll write at the bottom, you'll see that the Harry Potter series sold more than any other series, selling around 450 million copies, whereas the Twilight series only sold around 116 million! Even The Railway Series (Thomas the Tank Engine) sold more than Twilight (200 million) and those books were meant for little kids! Ha, gotta love the irony XD.

**16. Stephenie Meyer writes that the only thing that can kill a vampire is another vampire or a werewolf. Since Edward is a vampire created by Meyer, we can use her written characteristics and apply them to Harry Potter. Since Harry Potter is neither vampire nor wolf, this means that Harry Potter could not kill Edward and Edward would win. **

Avada Kedavra! Please, nothing can survive that! Except for a phoenix, but that's only because they're reborn whenever they die. And if you want to get scientific and say that technically Edward's already dead, then I'll just release Remus Lupin on him! I mean, Moony's a werewolf! Go Moony! :)

**17. Twilight led to many other supernatural romances in books and tv shows. **

Really? None of the people sparkle though! And there are witches and wizards in Harry Potter, who are technically supernatural and so have supernatural relationships! Name one supernatural relationship that happened because of Twilight!

I've actually noticed something in Twilight: Jacob Black is like a Twilight version of Sirius Black, in the sense that they both have Black as their last name, they both turn into dogs (willingly. Yes, even Jake! What about the full moon?) and they both have a motorbike. How original! And seriously, Clearwater? That's a rip-off from Penelope Clearwater in HP!

**18. Unlike Harry, nobody's thoughts are actually that deep or intellectual. I bet if any of us published our thoughts into a book, none would be great English lit; Bella's thoughts are more realistic. **

Really? 'Oh, I miss my dear Edward, I'll just throw myself off a cliff!' The fact that Harry's thoughts are deep show that he's good at thinking and that he can actually feel a rush of emotions! And the intellectual thinking shows that he's smart and can put things together! Yeah, I like the cliff example, only because it shows how melodramatic Bella is!

**19. at least all of them dosent a scar of a lightning bolt. **

Ok, first, fix your grammar! And second, only one character in Harry Potter has a lightning bolt scar and he's unique because of it! At least someone has an imagination!

**20. no witchcraft (practicing witchcraft is bad).**

What, you mean when they chant spells and pray and stuff? Please, that's Wicca stuff! I think…sorry if I offended anyone! And you're one to talk; I can't help but feel that Twilight is just one huge witchcraft thing, what with the vampires and stuff.

_Ok, here's the address if you're interested! Just scroll down to List of Best-Selling Book Series:_

_en . wikipedia . org / wiki / List _ of _ best-selling _ books_

_Obviously, you don't need the spaces!_


	3. Chapter 3

_Hey, you guys! I'm back! :)_

_madnessdownunder2: You really come up with the best stuff! I don't think of half the stuff you do! Keep up the good work, maybe I'll continue this story when I'm done with YOUR reasons!_

_wolfgirl: Yeah, Dumblys doesn't wear a dress…and you are right, sparkly vampires aren't exactly the most masculine of things XD_

_A Harry Potter Fan: Ok, I'm not stereotyping against all Twihards, it's just the ones that I see defending Twilight have appalling grammar. I'm not saying they all do, it's just the ones I see, even the reviewers in some stories. I'm sorry if you got that impression!_

_And so what if this is a bashing? I tend to get very over-emotional about stuff, so I do tend to exaggerate things and I know that this isn't an 'analysis'. I don't care if Bella was intentionally a Mary-Sue, it just makes it more fun to make fun of her. Say what you want, I'm going to continue this._

_WittyPhoenix: ;)_

_Mermaid-Luchia: Yeah, I read all 4 books and all I got was how the most important thing was to have a boyfriend._

_That is a very good point: when Ed leaves, Bella falls into depression and she's all 'I can't go on without my Eddie!', while Hermione saves Harry's life with Nagini and that._

_ChidorixCixBritannia: GO HARRY POTTER! Thanks! :) _

**21. At least they talk about reliegon even 4 a short while.**

Huh? What does religion have to do with this?

**22. Twilight goes more in depth with the emotions. You can feel Bella's pain when Edward leaves her. You can feel her confusion between Edward and Jacob. You can feel her love for Renesmee.**

Well, what about the emotions in Harry Potter? Say, when Snape dies and wants the last thing he sees to be Lily Evans' eyes? And what about when Dobby died and his last words were "Harry...Potter..."? How is that emotionless?

**23. Twilight is a modern-day Romeo and Juliet in its themes of everlasting but forbidden love; to be compared to such a classic is an honor.**

Ok, since I haven't read Romeo and Juliet, I can't really say anything here, though I'm starting to study it and I know the basics. How is the love between Bella and Edward forbidden? Their families don't hate each other, like the Montagues and Capulets in R&J and all that…

And they're too...perfect. You're right about the everlasting bit of the love, but I can't help thinking that they'll fight or grow sick of each other sooner or later. I mean, what sort of couple are you if you don't ever fight? (sings) Mary Su-ue!

**24. We like the time setting of Twilight. It is modern day.**

Harry Potter's only about ten or fifteen years back, who cares? It doesn't really make a difference! I mean, there's no technology in the story (like computers), so it doesn't really matter if it's in the 1990's or the 2000's, it's not like you can tell!

**25. Vampires stay with their partners will death. If you mess with their partners, you'll get what's coming. Even after their partner is dead, they will remain loyal to them, till their time comes.**

*cough* James and Lily Potter *cough* James Potter stayed with his wife until his death; heck, he even died to give her and their son time to get away! Tell me that's not loyalty!

**26. We like and appreciate the fact that the vampires and werewolves in Twilight aren't anything like the one's from us before. To us, it's nice to take on the vampire and werewolf concept. **

Like the one's from us before? I didn't get that bit, so I can't say anything here...

**27. You can read Twilight over and over again.**

You can read Harry Potter over and over again ;P

**28. It is the rare vampire novel that isn't about sex on some level, and the Twilight books are no exception. What makes Meyer's books so distinctive is that they're about the erotics of abstinence. Their tension comes from prolonged, superhuman acts of self-restraint. There's a scene midway through Twilight, in which, for the first time, Edward leans in close and sniffs the aroma of Bella's exposed neck. "Just because I'm resisting the wine doesn't mean I can't appreciate the bouquet," he says. "You have a very floral smell, like lavender...or freesia." He barely touches her, but there's more sex in that one paragraph than in all the snogging in Harry Potter.**

Um, kids in primary school are reading Harry Potter! Why would they want to read about sex? It'd traumatise them! Somehow, I'm thinking from this review that Twilight is all about sex! And how is there more sex there than kissing? Like you said, he barely touches her! It's all words!

**29. The characters change throughout the Twilight series as well. they may not be growing up like the Harry Potter Characters did, but they did change. The characters become more brave, stronger, loving, forgiving, etc. Each character changed in the Twilight books. Harry Potter characters changed as well, but they kept some of their bad traits with them.**

Yup, Mary Sue world alert. The HP characters change in the same way as the Twilight ones too! And of course the HP characters are going to have some bad traits; that's what makes us people! The fact that the Twilight characters (apparently) have no bad traits just makes them Mary Sues!

**30. IT has a graphic novel.**

Wow, just...wow. I'm not going to even bother with this one.

_Honestly, I think 30 is my fave one so far…I mean, really? XD_


	4. Chapter 4

_LJ4lyf: Yeah, I know how you feel. I'm just going to clear something up for everyone: I have NOTHING against Twilight. I don't hate it. I just can't stand it when Twihards try and drag HP down with idiotic reasons, so I respond by breaking down those reasons. Yeah, I love how much detail JKR puts in, I try and write something and compare it to hers and mine feels so under-described :(_

_Echo Vanity: Yeah, and Twihards wonder why we say that all of them have appalling grammar – I know that there're ones who can spell right but all the ones I've seen can't spell to save their lives. And yeah, I don't know why they bash HP, I haven't come across any sites that say that HP's better than Twilight while bashing Twilight at the same time. And…yeah, I can't respond to all of this, this is far too long to respond to properly XD But thanks for the long review!_

_madnessdownunder2: I'll stick you on my profile XD And excellent reasons! I'll have to stick them in additional chapters when I'm finished and add my comments in with yours :)_

_daniboy95: I know the feeling (nods solemnly)_

_KalikaChan: Yeah, I don't know how most of them can be so stupid (to any smart Twihards: notice I said MOST). And I know about the first few answers, I'm just reasoning that if you're reading a book, you're not going to know EXACTLY what the character looks like, even with the descriptions. I know Ed's good-looking but we're talking about a book, not a movie. If we were talking about a movie, I'd concede the point, Ed is pretty hot._

**31. has more female fans.**

And that matters, why? The fact that HP has male AND female fans, young AND old fans, just proves it's better!

**32. Harry Potter was mainly focused on children. We are into the more mature books. That have mature elements in them.**

Well, bully for you. I know for a fact that many adults read and love Harry Potter; I've even seen a few adult authors on this site who write Harry Potter fanfiction!

In fact, one adult (G. Norman Lippert) liked it so much that he's written a sequel (three stories so far) about James Potter, Harry Potter's son! They're called James Potter and the Hall of Elders' Crossing, James Potter and the Curse of the Gatekeeper and James Potter and the Vault of Destinies.

I don't see any adults writing a sequel to Twilight about Renesmee! :P So, basically what you're saying is that if we read Harry Potter, we're immature? Wow...

**33. Who wouldn't want two guys fighting over you? :D That just makes a good story. Am I right?**

Personally, I'd find that a bit annoying! And it's not like Bella's head needs even more inflating…

**34. Bella Swan is a strong character. SHe is brave, caring, forgiving, accepting, and just plain awesome :) She has risked her life many times to save someone she loves, such as Charlie, Renee, Edward, Jacob, The Cullens, Nessie, etc. She went through weeks of pain to save her daughter. SHe was willing to die so her baby could live. She has also formed a huge army and was prepared to fight till the death to protect her child and family. So yes, Bella is a role model. And No, she is not dependent on Edward.**

Most of the good Harry Potter characters are strong! And Harry is brave, caring, forgiving, accepting and awesome! This reviewer is right, Bella is plain! (ok, I kinda twisted that XD).

Lily Evans DIED to save her son! Harry Potter risked his life many times to save the people he loves and he even died in DH to save EVERYONE! Harry went through years of pain to save the people close to him! He was willing to die so that EVERYONE could live! He formed an army to fight Voldemort and therefore protect everyone he loves! Hermione Granger was tortured, yet she managed to lie and make up a believable story, especially since the torturer was Bellatrix Lestrange! (haha, Bella :P)

Bella not dependant on Edward, my arse! She threw herself off a bloody cliff when he left her! (Yeah, I love the cliff reference, it's so useful!) And she moped around and acted like a bloody sook!

**35. Twilight totally had a better, richer, more complex plot line than Harry Potter. **

No way in hell! How's love, love, more love and stalker, pretty-boy vampires more complex than the struggles of Harry Potter?

And then there are the themes that Rowling developed. I did a project on them for school and three themes are love, death and survival. Love for the people close to you, willingness to die for those you love and battling through the death of a loved one and the struggle for survival. Twilight is all about loving a 'sexy' vampire who stalks you and loves you for your smell. Yeah, I can see which story got the better end of the deal. How is Twilight better, richer and more complex than Harry Potter?

**36. Alice Cullen. She is just awesome! She would probably be considered as the "Luna" in Twilight. Am I right? Alice would be the perfect sister. She would make anyone smile if they had a bad day. **

Actually, Alice is pretty much the only Twilight character I like but I wouldn't like her to be my sister; she's too controlling, like dressing up Bella like a doll against her will! She seems a little too cheerful and girly sometimes though and she can NEVER be compared to Luna! Luna has her own style, which Alice can never compare to!

**37. All four Twilight books made us teary eyed. As for Harry Potter, some parts made us sad and a little teary, but Twilight was the one that really made us teary.**

Excuse me? I BAWLED when Fred died! I was all like "NOOOO!" when Remus and Tonks died! I cry whenever I read about Dobby dying, or watch Snape's memories in DH part 2 where he's hugging the dead Lily and crying his heart out for the love of his life! And I never shed ONE tear in Twilight! No one good in Twilight died, so what was there to cry over?

**38. The Twilight books were so amazing! We just could not put them down at all! For Harry Potter, some of the books we could not put down, but others made us a bit sleepy. **

The only way the Harry Potter books would make me sleepy is if I've read them so many times that I need a break to go to bed! Twilight on the other hand...romance, romance and more romance! Yawn...

**39. Daniel Radcliffe is doing pornografic musicals on Broadway and Robert Pattinson is singing and acting in other movies...who exactly got the better end of the deal?**

Umm...I don't know how to reply to this one...I can't imagine Danny doing anything like that and I never heard anything about this...

**40. Sirius Black can turn into a great, black dog, Peter Pettigrew can turn into a rat, James Potter can turn into a stag, Remus Lupin a werewolf Rita Skeeter can turn into a beetle and Minerva Mcgonagall can turn into a cat. How scary is that? Not at all. A Twilight shapeshifter would OWN them all :)**

It's called MAGIC, you pea-brain! And there aren't any Twilight shapeshifters, are there? I thought not (smiles sweetly). So it can't own the Animagi!

Honestly, if there were Twilight shapeshifters, I'd just say that the stories were more Mary Sued and more ripped-off from HP! Wait…actually, there are! The werewolves, who don't even need the full moon to transform! How does that make them werewolves? More like Animagi from HP which Meyer has just made all wolves and slapped the name 'werewolves' on. Moony would pwn Jake any day!


	5. Chapter 5

****_Hey guys, I'm back! Man, you're all so lucky that I found a way around my stupid computer's blockage of Microsoft Word 2010 aka this story (uploading what I had here and editing it here)...I was nearly in tears, coz I hate redoing things...randomly, the next chapter is the last of mine._

_madnessdownunder2: Again, excellent reasons! :) Um, I know that werewolves are technically shape-shifters but what Meyer's done is have them able to shift at any time, so she's basically disregarded the whole 'full moon' thing and allowed them to shape-shift whenever they feel like it. Isn't the whole point of a werewolf that they transform on the full moon?_

_ollie: Thanks for that! :) I didn't know what the hell they were talking about!_

_the one with a divine smile: Thanks! :) Yeah, I never thought of that...I'd say that Ron's feelings started developing sometime in CoS (quote 'Is Lockhart the smarmiest bloke ever?' or something like that), whereas Bella sees Eddie and falls in deep love (not just a crush) instantly. I never thought of that!_

_Mimi-loves-llamas: Interesting username, I like it XD Yup, if Meyer decrees that only another vampire or a werewolf could kill the vampires (technically, since they're dead, Avada Kedavra wouldn't work against them, the Twihards got one thing right...I think it was them) then we just sic Moony on them and since he's a werewolf, he'll kill 'em all! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ahem, excuse me, I've just had my daily intake of sugar and I probably won't stop at that..._

_Dracarot: Really? Interesting! I'd check out the video but after not having Internet for days as a result of going on Youtube, I think I've learnt my lesson... XD Yeah, HP's just so awesome like that!_

_A James Potter Fan: You're forgiven, I love James Potter too, he's one of my fave characters :)_

**41. The HP books are all depressing. Lots of good characters die, which isn't cool. And they're just full of violance, and ridiculous plans.**

A good book will be a little depressing! It shows that you can comprehend the emotions in it! Good characters must die to make the story realistic (although I'd prefer it if Fred, Remus, Tonks, Dobby and Sirius lived!). A good author *cough JKR cough* knows that for the sake of the story, you have to sacrifice some people, to make it realistic! Name ONE good character in Twilight that died! I rest my case.

Violence, huh? What about the violence in Twlight, with the James and Bella scene? Fine, you don't like violence. So you'd prefer that Voldemort and Harry chat over tea and biscuits and then fly away on winged unicorns surrounded by rainbows? Lol...

**42. Stephenie Meyer did her resarch and found a place like Forks so the vampires could be outside. JK just made one up. **

Um, really? All she did was make up names of the school, town and stuff, which is called being CREATIVE. She also made up Privet Drive and Little Whinging, but made them so believable that I actually thought they were real places!

Honestly, it's fiction, use your imagination! And anyway, Hogwarts is in Scotland and Harry lives in England, so technically she didn't make the places up!

The fact that Meyer had to use a real place just shows that she has no imagination…

**43. The sparkles are so unique and creative. They're not stupid.**

What vampire sparkles? I actually have to agree with you there, it's unique, but seriously? Sparkles? Come on Meyers, you can do better than that! No creature can shine in the sun, be it vampire or werewolf or even freaking demons! And besides, if she's trying to create the image of tough-boy vampire *cough Emmett cough*, why would she have them _sparkle? _

**44. harry potter is too hard for a young child to read.**

So is Twilight! Look at reason 28! What young child would want to read THAT? I remember that I read Philosopher's Stone when I was about nine years old! Nine years old is classified as a young child, isn't it? My brother read the first chapter of HP when he was eight! What kid would want to read about sappy romance like Twilight anyway?

**45. Twilight is better because the books are written better and the characters bring more to the table for the readers.**

How? How is it written better? When Edward left Bella, all I got was that Bella was a weak idiot who was totally dependent on her little Eddie and jumped off a cliff because she's 'so in love'! Whereas when Remus catches up with Harry, Ron and Hermione in DH in Grimmauld Place after leaving Tonks, you can feel how upset he is and how conflicted he is; he wants her, but he doesn't want to hurt her and his son with his condition!

And as for bringing more to the table, Twilight is all about romance and having a boyfriend, while Harry Potter has many struggles and many different themes and feelings!

**46. It's set in America.**

Umm...I'm just going to ignore this one...


	6. Chapter 6

_Ok, this has moved on to www . eatliver . com (obviously without the spaces) and I am not responsible for any mistakes. I am SO sorry for the late update but two of my stories got deleted and you know how they bar you from updating for a bit when that happens -_-_

_maddiismintxx: Thank you! You know, if you want a website that makes total fun of Twitlight and Bella Mary Sue Swan, just type in Frozen Apples and click on the wikia. Trust me, you won't regret it!_

_rainbowsmilkshakes and ponies: Haha! Exactly what I've always thought! We all have great minds to conquer the world!_

_gracefuldarkangel: Yeah, Meyer used 'chagrin' far too many times to count! In fact, she's used it so many times that the wikia I mentioned above made a whole page for it – also, she said the WEST coast of Brazil (cough no research cough)._

_Matt Guthrie: I completely agree! Did you know that Meyer got the idea from a dream about a sparkly vampire and a girl in a meadow in love? Eurgh. Some anti-Twilighters call it and the whole of Twilight Meyer's 'wet dream' and 'sex fantasy'. Lol._

_madnessdownunder: Yep, I know that they're shape-changers, they're just insults to werewolves! And did you know that Meyer tried to explain the Meyerpires and Meyerwolves (hehe) through science – all that chromosome shit and that. EPIC FAIL. And also, it was written in first person POV so that mindless Twitards could imagine themselves in Bella's shoes and feel like Emoward loves them – that just proves that she has no personality XD Yeah, Tinkerbell's one of the many nicknames for Mr Disco Ball and if you go to the wikia and type 'Nicknames for Edward Cullen'…well, it's a dream come true._

_HiddenDemigod: Heck yeah! But seriously, I read a funny story somewhere (can't remember what it is!) where these two guys try and find ways to kill Fairy Boy and they could only come up with Anti-Sparkle Lotion. What does that tell you about vampires having no flaws and being Mary Sues/Gary Stus? -_-_

_Guest: Well, not all Twitards are retarded – one of my best friends is a Twilight fan and she's pretty smart and actually knows basic English (and year 6 English, considering she is in year 6) and she loves mocking it, even though she's a fan. Most of them are retards though, I agree._

_kingszey: I didn't hear a thing ^_^ And don't diss the French, I'm learning it! Anyway, yeah, I agree, I read somewhere that you get these girls reading these wonderful classics and everyone's all happy until it's revealed that they're only reading it because of Bella -_-_

**1. The boxsets! **

'Modern, elligent, to the point', as opposed to keeping them in treasure chests. 'We believe in magic too much', huh? That's just one way of showing that JKR kept us hooked and how much we love the books! Personally, I'm still waiting for my Hogwarts letter… :P

**2. Harry Potter copied Twilight**

Um, excuse me? Since when did JKR rip off Sirius Black from Jacob Black? HP was written before Twilight, so if anything, Meyer copied JKR! Jacob and Sirius Black: they're both dogs, both with the name Black and both have motorbikes! Rip-off from Sirius, anyone? And Leah Clearwater totally ripped off Penelope Clearwater and Charlie Swan? Poor rip-off from Charlie Weasley!

**3. The logos**

'_Very unique and recognisable cute swirrel on the g' as opposed to 'bulky and dumb. who ever drew this has a twitch that activately multiple times in a row during the time they formed the 'p' in 'Potter''_

Well, I personally prefer lightning-shaped words (reference to Harry's scar, anyone? See, meaning!) as opposed to swirly girly 'g's which have nothing whatsoever to do with vampires or anything, except for dumb teenage girls!

**4. next, the hidden meanings behind the tittles**

'_TWILIGHT – light means good, good means pure, pure means jesus, this title tells us to love his majesty, jesus Christ. I love this title and I love jesus too. ;)'_

'_Harry POTter' – first of all, the 'hairy' is sublimianally promoting bad hygiene. the POT is telling people to become potheads and stoner and smoke pot and marijuana. my cousin is a harry potter fan and my aunt found a bong in her room. PROOF!'_

Um…I really can't think of anything to say…this has to be the most ridiculous thing I've heard. I don't smoke anything and I really can't think of a retort for that ridiculous 'hairy' thing.

The pot? Well, that's just your cousin, don't judge us all based on her! I am fiercely anti-drug and I've sworn that I'll never drink, smoke or take any drugs!

And what if a non-Christian or Catholic read Twilight? You can't force Jesus onto someone who doesn't believe!

**5. LASTLY, the authers**

'_stephanie meyer is flawless and brings out the writer inside each of us. 1 time my english teacher told me my writing reminded her of steph's and I was sooo happy. i got a c on the story because it was because it was late :( (she's also REALLY pretty but don't worry, im not gay)'_

'_J.K. Rowling – Okay, first of all, I didnt even kno the writer of harry potter till 5 mins ago, i had to look her up. so OBVI she isnt rly tht famous. 2nd of all, what kind of name is J.K?! Just kidding? What are you just kidding about? "lol, i wrote this great series about wizards, JK it sucks"…you think she could get a BIT more creative, right? LOSER.'_

Ok, I'm going to start off by saying something I never would usually say: FUCK OFF. SM is flawless: that reflects Bella's personality and who projects themselves into a story? JKR brings out the writer in me, not SM – if anything, SM shows me all the things I could ever do wrong ;) Story got a C coz it was late? Suuuuure, I believe you…

Um, JKR's name is on the front of the books, how could you not know who wrote them? She is more famous than SM will ever be! And don't you dare tarnish the name of J.K. Rowling! She can't choose her name (even though Kathleen isn't really her middle name).

_**Ok, here's a little rant:**_

And one last thing: SMeyer's grammar and research is APPALLING. She uses 'chagrin' just to make herself seem smart and we don't need to be reminded that Edward is so fucking hot every fucking page! Also, she says that Bella is plain looking, yet uses words like 'ivory-skinned' and 'soft, yet slender' to describe her. Yeah. Plain. Also, she has SIX guys after her, one of whom is her Biology teacher!

Besides, in an interview, Meyer stated exactly what she thought Bella looked like:

_In my head, Bella is very fair-skinned, with long, straight, dark brown hair and chocolate brown eyes. Her face is heart-shaped—a wide forehead with a widow's peak, large, wide-spaced eyes, prominent cheekbones, and then a thin nose and a narrow jaw with a pointed chin. Her lips are a little out of proportion, a bit too full for her jaw line. Her eyebrows are darker than her hair and more straight than they are arched. She's five foot four inches tall, slender but not at all muscular, and weighs about 115 pounds. She has stubby fingernails because she has a nervous habit of biting them. And there's your__very__detailed description._

Now then, why don't you go look up a picture of Stephenie Meyer and see who that looks like, hmm?

_I don't know who wrote this site but they are definitely on my bottom 10 list, including Meyer, Bella, Edward and Twilight in general._

_Ok, this story's done and I have a favour to ask: my best friend, SlytherinGirl26, is writing a Marauder's Era story and she's got seventy seven views, yet only five reviews. Can you please read it and leave at least one review for her? She's losing her inspiration and I hate to see her so upset :(_


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